I've come to a sort of conclusion. Its not earth-shattering or revolutionary, but here it is:

I don't know how to blog.

This may not seem to make sense - you're claiming to not know how to blog, while blogging? - but it is very true.

I can diarise -  telling you all about the shit I've been up to lately which no one but those involved would really care about, usually in dot point or blunt sentence form.

I can bitch - boy, can I bitch. Apologies to anyone who follows me on Twitter, I have been a massive pile of passive-agressive rage this week, and you've all see the fireworks.

I can share information - oh hey, click on this link. I run this, and 10 people follow it.

But that's not really blogging, is it? That's not what people want to read. People want something entertaining, insightful but real, and if I'm honest, that's what I'd like to do. But I can't. To do that, I'd need to tell you I feel something, or think about something, and in doing that, I reveal myself and if there is one thing a fat person is afraid of, it's being caught exposing themselves.

I also seem very unable to reach a conclusion. I get distracted by the details, or I get distracted by something happening around me in the real world, and I just abort the conversation.

Hm, conversations. I've always said that if someone asks me a question, I'll answer it honestly. This is true, and its something I stick by. But to just sit here in my lounge room and assume someone in the world gives one iota of a shit about what I have to say/think/feel/share unprovoked? Undoable.

So, if you ever have a question, whether it is relevant to anything I'm posting about, something you know about me in the general context, something you've just been thinking about and would like to have a dialogue with someone, anyone over, to work through the pieces for yourself - fire away.

No one will. But you can try. Anon options bring out the people. In the mean time, I'm going to try to be more real. Or at least more interesting and focused with my blogging.